Something for most of us to think about..
The old year has come to past and the new year has come at last.
The memories of the past year still lingers within my mind, haunting and tormenting my soul.
2006 was the start of a supposedly wonderful love story for me..but it ended as the year had ended.
If God would give me another chance to rewrite that story, i would give up everything just to create a happier ending..
The climax had passed, the chapters are slowly fading away into obscurity..but word by word, moment by moment, the memories of that love would never fade in my heart.
I dont want to wait forever for nothing…but i really just want to have her back again..if God permits..and if not..i wish that he could make me forget..
I was about to give up all my hope but..i’m hoping that there would be a sequel, or probably a backstory to this love story.hahaha.
I’ve never loved anyone so much that i was willing to give up everything i had just to be with her even for just another day.
Most of the people who knows this story, only said two words to me..two words that i’m trying to deny…trying to ignore…trying to hide.."MOVE ON"
Who wants to move on?….after such an event?
While you are still being chewed alive by the pain that seeps deep within your heart and soul…making you feel so desperate, so meaningless and worthless..
Of course, i know a lot of people had already experienced this stuff..
This ends my ambient dreams..
What would the new year bring to me this time..?
I dont want to expect much this time..i’m already feeling like i’m in hell.
I dont want to hate her or blame her…because perhaps it was all my fault..my mistake..and if it was all mine, could God give me one more chance to undo what was done? and at what point of my life do i want to reset, restart, redo all the events that contributed to this pain..
hahaha..parang sci-fi,butterfly-effect….?
I think i’ve been too good at hiding my emotions..no one even had the clue that i was feeling so down and trouble..but that was what i really wanted..i dont want to bother anyone else about how i feel.
I wish that someday she could realize that this love was too great to be ignored..of course…iwould want her back in my life…so far thats how i feel…
someday…it might change..naturally, i would find someone else to focus my attention to..
someone who would not love just one aspect of me…but the whole "me"…
there are still a lot of people in search for love in this world..searching blindly..
some are searching for something they already have, some are searching for something already in front of them just waiting to be acknowledged. Some are searching for a perfect love, but their love is not so perfect. …
And as the text message quote says:
"The greatest disease in the world isn’t medical, it is being unwanted, unloved and uncared for. We can cure physical diseases but the only cure for despair is love.There are those who are dying for a piece of bread, but more are dying for a little bit of love."
HAPPY NEW YEAR TO ALL!!!
..i cant deny that i’m still sad…hahaha..if only someone could help me forget..hmm…thank God there’s DOTA.
